Wise in our relationships
Dr Mammen P Cherian tackles the contentious issue of sex before marriage from his vast experience as a marriage counsellor as well as a medical professional.
“If you keep yourself pure, you will be a special utensil for honourable use. Your life will be clean, and you will be ready for the Master to use you for every good work. Run from anything that stimulates youthful lusts. Instead, pursue righteous living, faithfulness, love, and peace” (2 Tim 2:21-22)
I was attending a medical screening camp for migrant workers at a construction site with my medical team. In between, a gentleman came to me and introduced himself as an engineer and supervisor at that site. He requested for some time to talk in private when the camp got over. As the day wound down, he rushed to me and took me to his private cabin. I waited for him to break his silence, which was a good few minutes in coming. He started, “Sir, I think I am HIV infected”. “What makes you think like that”, I asked. “A year back, we friends went on a Bangkok trip and there we tried out sex with some girls”. “Oh, so that’s what is troubling you?” I retorted. “Sir, they were certified – but I am anxious” he continued. “Certified? What is that?”, I was now perplexed. “Sir, the sex workers gave us a recent report of their HIV blood test when we approached them”. “So, if that is the case, why do you worry now?”, I asked in puzzlement. “But sir someone told me that these reports can be forged, and that HIV can spread in spite of taking preventive measures during intercourse! Now I am doing tests every month, and since my marriage has been fixed, I am not able to sleep properly”! Since I was pressed for time and our consultation was so short to arrive at any meaningful conclusion, I referred him to a Psychiatrist.